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Top 5 Worst Cities

  1. New Jersey - don't tell me it isn't a city - it's so small. Don't tell me that Rhode Island is smaller either, because it is, but that's besides the point. New Jersey is just crammed, and it feels like generally I'm at a very large pharmacy that's packed like a Phish concert in New Jersey. New Jersey is one big Phish concert without the Phish.

  2. Akron, Ohio - A gas station attendant locked me in the bathroom while she went outside to smoke a blunt and forgot about me for 20 minutes - also the toilet had just been cleaned with undiluted cleaning spray (no droplets - it was wiped off) man even with a toilet seat cover over the toilet I still actually legitimately got chemical burns from sitting down for .01 seconds - it must have been just undiluted bleach. Man. I'm telling you. That was the worst.

  3. Peoria, Illinois - simply just fucking sucked. I hated it.

  4. Chicago, Illinois - buildings ugly. Didn't love the whole "bean" situation. Get at me, I didn't care for it. The buildings felt too formal.

  5. Iowa City - Sucks

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